Why Horses Are So Much Cooler Than Unicorns…

Argh! I can practically feel the hate vibes vibrating over the webmosphere! I can feel eyes widening in outrage and disbelief- is it possible? Could it be? Could this boring little insignificant human living in a boring little town in a boring little country really have the nerve to say that she thinks horses are better than unicorns? Well it’s true.

Now for starters, I do like unicorns. And I mean the real, cool, fight battles and wars and unite the world unicorns. But the cartoon ones prancing around on rainbows with hearts plastered on their forehead? No. Just no. But here is the thing. Horses are here. Horses are around being useful and great listeners, making you feel like you can fly when you soar over a jump and just being there. Where are the unicorns? When the going gets tough and help is needed scaddddooooom! The unicorns run off to fantasy worlds to stare at the moon. Horses have won medals. Horses have won wars. Horses have made a slow and terrible way in horrible conditions in which they may ultimately die. Just look at this book:

 This is the heartwarming tale about a horse about to be sold for meat that is rescued and then… well you can guess the rest. The horse turns out to amazingly fast and there follows troubles and fame and etc. It’s just fab. Would you find a unicorn doing all of that? Nope! A unicorn you would save and then it would be off off off to come back one day to bestow the honour of one wish to you. A horse would stick by your side and stamp its feet in puddles so you get muddy water all up your legs.

Horses are awesome, horses are cool, I’d pick horses over unicorns because I am no fool.

Yep.

Um.

So.

I have a history assessment I’m supposed to be doing so…

Farewell

F xx

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