Nothing Good Happens After One O’clock AM

It doesn’t, I tell you. Even the Television programmes are crap. Up until about 12:30 you get the occasional Father Ted episode, maybe a Russell Howard’s good news. But then everything changes. As soon as the clock strikes 01:00 everything becomes pointless. At sleepovers the conversation dries up like a shallow puddle in the sahara desert, everyone is pretending to have a good time but really we’re just thinking shut the fuck up and let me sleep.

At 1:00 Am the night seems pointless. Watching programmes on 40d and BBC iplayer becomes boring. You really need the loo but can’t be bothered to get up. . You’ve got to get things ready for the next day but you don’t have the will. You want to read your book but you’re too tired to care. It’s pointless. And you’re really tired but you don’t want to go to sleep

Despite this, I found something out recently. One of the best times to write is in the middle of the night. When it’s all quiet and the dark encloses you from all around. It’s so quiet and peaceful, the neighbours and their girlfriends have stopped the arguing that has been going on for hours when there were things that were actually interesting to do. The night time brings a sense of urgency that makes you write fast, fast, fast. The light is low and for some reason the light from lamps or fairy lights is so much softer than the normal one. It has a sort of rosy glow around the edges that makes your bedroom feel like  a sort of safe haven and going outside into some sort of act of supreme bravery, let alone going down stairs. Shadows stretch and expand making things that are perfectly innocent in the day time seem scary and sinister. It makes for good writing because let’s face it- no one wants to read about someone happy.

One of the main rules of being awake at night time is to never make too much noise. Making noise in the silent dark house is like breaking the spell. All of a sudden the magic is GONE and your just tired and bored. And for some reason having the curtains open even just a crack makes you feel all uneasy because someone could be looking in. I seriously find it hard to walk past the front door for fear that hands are going to reach through the letter box.

So no, nothing remotely interesting happens after 1:00 Am but a lot of interesting things could happen in stories when you’re writing at 1:00 Am. Now this post might have been a bit rubbish and all over the place but don’t blame me.  It”s 01:15.

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